I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize