Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i think i have two assholes
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
