just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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