Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
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