I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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