Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
