He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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