Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
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