So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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