He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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