but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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