we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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