What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
