nut hugger
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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