oh god the rape fog is back!
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
so let's talk penis.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
