Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
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