Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize