I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
