Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
