Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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