Do vagina's smell?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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