OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
