Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
