it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
