its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
