Don't make out with my wife yet
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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