so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Randomize
