Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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