Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
