jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Non-Jews are for practice
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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