can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
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