Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
