Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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