I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
