I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
