The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
