my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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