I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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