you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
