You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
