Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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