Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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