Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
