please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Bring me that man meat
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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