i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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