U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
