Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
