It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize