His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
