If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
